Now You're Gone
by Shiba Ayame
Summary: She was grateful for such a quiet Sunday night - with nobody around, nobody could see her miss him so much. Asuma/Kurenai oneshot.


I was missing someone very close to me and they gave me this plotbunny in attempt to get me out of my rut I'd dug in another fic. So this one's dedicated to Yamato-kun, for giving me this wonderfully sad image in my head. I miss you, baby.

Disclaimer: Still don't own Naruto, for all of you who've subscribed to my fics. And for those who are reading me for the first time, I don't own Naruto.

Now You're Gone

Oneshot

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It was almost midnight in Konoha, and this particular Sunday most of the villagers had gone home from their drinking escapades. The street she lived on was silent, and for this she was glad; the lights belonging to the other occupants of the area were all off, and people were enjoying a good night's sleep.

But instead of curling up in the sheets that still smelled like him, she knelt on her balcony in the negligee he loved so much on her - that sheer white babydoll number - pulling out the Zippo he'd left behind to light a stick of incense for the small upright tablet engraved with his name. Hands clasped, she closed her eyes and choked her way through a prayer, placing down a stick of odango in his favorite flavors on a little dish in offering.

It took her a moment, the stress of having him no longer there and the weight of the child - his child - she was carrying now bearing down on her knees. She placed a hand on her back in attempt to straighten it, pushing on it just a little till she felt it give a little pop. She didn't care that the breeze that had just swept over her little outdoor space had been chillier now that fall was settling in, or that her slippers lay forgotten on the floor at her bedside and the floor of her balcony wasn't the smoothest surface known to man.

She looked up, up to the stars, to spot the brightest one, glowing brilliant against its black velvet backdrop. That one, she believed, was him. Only he would shine just for her when the rest of the village was sleeping, standing sentinel over the woman he loved and the baby they'd created together... albeit uninentionally. She wouldn't blame him for that, no; who in their right mind would blame someone for the creation of a new life, one that would mean more to her than her own?

One hand fell to her stomach, now protruding to the point where she could no longer see her feet, warming her hand with a tad of chakra to calm the baby's stirring. A single tear slid down her cheek, not completely unnoticed but temporarily ignored. "I miss you..." she whispered out into the night, and a flash of brilliant blue-white streaked against the black.

oOoOoOo

"Mommy"

Kurenai looked down at her son, giving him a small smile. "Yes, Asuma-chan?"

"Why are you crying?" The look on the boy's face was purely innocent, curious, concerned for his mother.

"It's nothing, sweetie," the kunoichi-turned-mother said, tousling her son's wavy jet-black hair. "I just miss your daddy..."

"Where is Daddy?" he asked, not complaining as his mother lifted him into her lap, cuddling into her warmth. The balcony, he decided, was too cold during autumn.

Kurenai raised a hand, pointing to the brightest, most prominent star in the sky. "Right there," she whispered in his ear, "That's your daddy. Up in heaven."

Her eyes were closed, fighting off tears when little Asuma's eyes widened, squirming in his mother's lap and pointing up at the sky. "Look, Mommy! Up at the sky!"

Sure enough, shooting stars lit up the night sky, flying across in beautiful icy arcs. The sheer beauty of it all captivated Kurenai, to the point where she'd stopped crying just to watch. But the next thing Asuma had said made her stop to think a little more.

"The stars are sad," Asuma said, that childish wisdom had never seemed more real. "Daddy doesn't want you to cry over him, Mommy."

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So, what do you think? My idea was that little Asuma Jr. is about three or four. That's the age when you get that unshakeable kid smarts that make adults sit back and go "Awhabafuckingwho?!"

You know you loved it... Review so that I find the courage to press on and write more depressing oneshots! XD


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